and don't get me started on bras...

frozen dog poop

in the front yard

is just as icky as non-frozen dog poop

when it comes to cleaning it up

~~

the paper shredder in the office

will not shred

a forgotten metal rabies tag taped to the vet's receipt

and

instead will make a god awful noise

and

then make you spend a half hour with needle nose pliers

trying to pull out the mangled mess

~~

no matter how much hair conditioner you use in the winter time

your hair will still be dry

and

if you use too much

you look like lady ga ga getting ready for a performance

which isn't too terrible I guess

if you're staying inside all day where nobody can see you

~and honestly I happen to love lady ga ga~

~~

potato soup

that boils over onto your stove top

can be used in place of

elmer's glue

~yucky starch~

~~

grocery shopping

can be fun

if you use really cute re-useable bags

and

hang out with the interesting people at

whole foods

~~

the fabulous tasting

de-tox tea

I've been living on

probably isn't doing anything for me

since I tend to eat cookies and chocolate

while I'm drinking it

*

how's your weekend going

?

or what I would tell HIM, over and over again.....

because

my own words aren't making any sense today

and

the few that keep trying to escape through my chapped lips

tend to bruise my already tender heart

even when I whisper them

so

I'm just going to use these

warm and fuzzy...

when I'm outside

and

the winter day is too bright

I put my sunglasses on

but

when

the winter day is too bright

on my computer screen

I add a texture to it

and

the brightness fades

~~

the

old

"vintage

postcard looking"

photo

that is born

from

a

winter day

"that makes me squint"

photo

makes me feel

warm

and

fuzzy

and

in wisconsin

in

the winter

warm and fuzzy

is a

good thing

*

sometimes simple things can be big things when they live in your heart...

the softness of my furry baby after her bath

~

a perfectly crisp apple

~

the smell inside the aveda store at the mall

~

finding some old photos I had forgotten about

~

wrapping up in a blanket to watch

"proof of life"

again

and

loving meg ryan even more than I already do

~

meeting girlfriends for lunch

where the eating only took us ten minutes

but

the talking and laughing went on for hours and hours

~

loving my mom for taking and understanding my side

when somebody said

something

that hurt my feelings

~

a warm kiss on the back of my neck that I didn't see coming

~

jumping up and down when my son came home from school

excited about an upcoming project

*

these are some of the simple things that happened in my life the past two weeks

~

thanks to the wonderful and ever amazing christina

many of us are sharing

simple things

today

~

please visit her if you want to play along

or

if you just want to read all the many many blogs

sharing

simple things

*

I really don't know why either...

the climbing goat from yesterday

brought lots of questions

and

I wish I had a really smart answer

but

I don't

~~

maybe the climbing thingy majingy is just to test their

intelligence

and

agility

and

to add some excitement to their otherwise kind of mundane life

or

maybe to add some excitement to ours

~~

who knows

~~

what I do know is that first

you make friends with the goats

then you let them know you have food for them

and

they watch intently

while you attach their food to one of the spinners

the brave goats

start climbing

hoping that the middle stand is where the food stops

but

like the picture from yesterday

they will go all the way to top to get the food

if that's where you send it

and

then it's over quickly

~as they tend to inhale their food~

and

they head back down

and

wait for the next person

sending a bucket of food up the ropes

~~

they have been doing this for years

at this little animal farm/vegetable market

and

it's safe

and

obviously the goats love it

as do the kids

~~

well

and

some adults too

*

i'm still playing with the polaroid coloring

as it seems so fitting

for the grey days that have settled over wisconsin

it doesn't matter who won, it's about how you played the game

wrong

no it's not

we only say that to be good parents

and

to make sure our kids feel good about themselves

when the other team grounds them up like coffee beans

and

buries them in the dirt

~~

but

for adults

it's all about winning

because

it's gives us a reason

to throw our arms up in the air

and

dance around the house in our bathrobe and messy hair

almost tripping over the dog

while shouting

"I won I won"

while

totally embarrassing the above mentioned children

~~

SO

the winner

of my

winter wonderland drawing

is

kathy kathy ko kathy

banana fanana

fo fathy

mi my mo mathy

KATHY

~~

thank you all

so very very much for loving my photos

and

entering the drawing

and

making me feel really special

~~

you're the best

*

i played around with the photo above to create a polaroid effect

~not sure if I pulled it off or not~

and

yes

that's a real goat climbing really high to get to the bucket of corn on the spinner

that was filled on the ground where we were standing and then sent up to the top

by the spinning rope

~lord there must be a technical term for this~

anyhow

am i the only one who loved this stuff as a kid

and

now as an adult

will still stand there and watch this for hours

*

but I can't...

too often

he doesn't realize how hard it is to be his mother

~~

too often

he doesn't realize how much I love him and want to protect him forever

~~

too often

he doesn't realize

that on the nights he keeps me awake with worry

and

my bed pillows swell with tears

that

I want to run away for a bit and become someone else

~~

but

I can't

because

I'm his mom

and

mom's aren't supposed to run away

ever

~~

but

they can think about it

*

a little housekeeping...

the dust bunnies

roll across the hardwood floors like tumbleweeds in the desert

~

the sliding glass doors

are filled with fingerprint smudges

and

I don't even have toddlers anymore

~

and

there's toothpaste remains on the bathroom countertops

~~

sure

I just described my house

but

that's also how I feel about my space here

~

maybe it's the new year

or

maybe it's that I have links on my sidebar that are no longer in use

or

maybe it's just that

if I'm busy cleaning up my blog

then

I don't have to vacuum or do the dishes or clean off the gunk

hanging from one of the racks in my oven

~I think it's cheese from a frozen pizza~

~

anyhow

this weekend

~mostly sunday~

I'm sprucing things up a bit

by

fluffing up the pillows

on my blog

~

honestly

you won't notice anything drastic

or

probably

even that much of a difference

to tell you the truth

~

but

I will

and

I'll feel better and more energized

and

even have an extra little bounce in my step

the next time you see me

*

oh

and

there's still time to enter your name

to win a photo

but do it quickly

because

at noon

today

I will be picking a winner

but

it won't be announced until monday morning

::

the good, the bad and too often, the sad....

while watching tv this week

~~

keith urban was adorable on ellen

~

I thought lady ga-ga gave a wonderful interview on oprah

even

after a disastrous wardrobe malfunction during her performance

~

am I the only one

who wants

to put duct tape over elizabeth hasselbeck's mouth

~

ricky gervais hosted the golden globes

and

even though I love him and think he's hysterically funny

I don't think anyone appreciated the job he did

~

on the bachelor

well I don't even want to admit I watch it

but I do

and

so far I love tenley

and

was it completely perfect when michelle's bluff was called and she walked out

~

yippee

there's only 21 more days until the olympics

~

I will miss him terribly

and

american idol will never ever EVER be the same

once simon leaves

~

tonight

the

huge celebrity fundraiser

for haiti

~organized by george clooney~

will be on every channel

with no commercial interruptions

and

I plan on being front and center

with a big bowl of popcorn

for the entire show

~

when an anonymous person

chartered a plane this week to get 53 orphans out of haiti

~47 of them with adoption papers being expedited~

I stood up and cheered

but

when an injured little girl's mother

was told her daughter's arm would have to be amputated

due to the extent of her injury

she cried out to the sky

that she would rather see her child die

than have to see her live as an amputee in haiti

and

then

I cried

*

one + one = 1027

600

posts

~~

there it was in black and white

and

I had failed to pay any attention to it

until yesterday

~~

but

the more I thought about it

and

then about all of the

living and love and experiences and friends and dreams and inspiration and support

that have wrapped themselves around me

during the past four years

I felt that I had left out a very important part of my life

~~

my very first blog

a baby of sorts

~~

when I first decided to blog

in december of 2005

it was on the heels of another one of our moves

and

I wanted to keep our friends and family up to date

with all of our life changes

~~

but

it quickly became much more than that

~~

it became a huge part of my daily life

for two years

~~

but

then one morning I woke up

and

knew that something had to change

~~

like a favorite sweater shrinking in the dryer

"seaside dreamer"

just wasn't fitting me anymore

~~

it was filled with art

that I was no longer working on

and

many photos from flickr

that weren't mine

because

at that time

photography wasn't important to me

and

I knew in my heart

that I needed something new

something fresh

~~

so

"more doors"

~be yourself...everyone else is taken~

was born

representing all the homes I have lived in

while

cherishing the fact that there will be

more doors

I'll open in the future

~~

and

it's been here

on this blog

where

I've learned to fly

~~

where

my photography

that I didn't fall in love with

until

I went to squam in september of 2008

has a home

~~

where

my words

that so often seem jumbled up in my mind

somehow make sense when I see them written here

~~

so

I decided I couldn't leave out my first blog

because

all of us have someone or something

we need to give credit to

for a starting point

with something special in our lives

~~

so here's to my old blog

who helped me get here

~~

1027

posts

*

and

to those of you who mentioned it

by all means

if you win the drawing

and

want the truck photo

from yesterday

instead of a winter scene

it's all yours

*

I should have been paying more attention...

I had no idea

that my winter wonderland photos

from yesterday's

"I hope you dance"

highlighted

my 600th post

~~

I had no idea

that my winter wonderland photos

would bring so many

soft and warm compliments

making

me feel incredibly special

~~

but

I do know that

all of you

who made me feel so wonderful

deserve

a

prize

~~

so here we go

~~

on

saturday

someone will win

a photo

from

yesterday's post

~you'll get to pick the photo of your choice~

when I draw a name

out of my dead animal hat

~~

if you commented yesterday

you're already in the contest

but

if you didn't leave a comment yesterday

you have until saturday

at

noon

to add one

*

good luck

and

thank you from the bottom of my heart

for loving my photos

I hope you dance...

the past few days

we have been living in a winter wonderland

~~

waking every morning

to what they say is

frozen fog

and

then spending the entire day

looking outside

silenced by the beauty before us

unfortunately

the words

to describe my blindingly beautiful world right now

are failing me

but

if I could find any that fit perfectly

I think

you'd want to sprinkle them all over the floor

like rose petals

and

dance

in them

*

so I married a opossum whisperer...who knew ?

I was going to tell you how amazing our drive in the country was yesterday morning

after another frozen fog rolled in the night before

painting our world in shades of white and grey

but

instead I decided to share with you

my new little love

he was the first

of three opossums we found

waddling in snow banks during our

four hour drive

~~

when we stopped

to get a closer look

at this one

I was sure he was going to take off in the opposite direction

and

run away

but

actually

he hardly budged

~

actually

I'm not sure opossums even know how to run

and

then my husband

~who continues to amaze me with his hidden talents~

started calling him closer to the car

the same way you'd get the attention of a dog or cat

and

it worked

~~

in fact it worked so well

he almost ended up going under our car heading towards the other side of the road

~I know I know...don't go there~

anyhow

when he finally turned to leave

I noticed that the end of his tail was missing

and

that his back left leg was covered in burrs

and

I was sad

that we had coaxed him closer to us

for nothing

but

cute photos

~~

so

next time we go out for a drive

I'm taking opossum food with me

just in case

~~

anybody know what they eat

?

he's given me everything a girl could possibly want, so I made a video to thank him

maybe february...

everyone picked a word and ran into the new year

with their capes flying in the wind behind them

~~

I thought my cape would fly

too

but

it's hanging down my back

waiting patiently

~~

I think february will be the start of my new year

or

maybe march

~~

who gave january all the power anyhow

*

my heart aches for the people of haiti

I'm pretty good at dodge ball, but obviously suck at playing tag...

tag

as in

"tell us 7 things about yourself

because

I just acknowledged you as someone who inspires me

and

just shared 7 things about myself

on my blog

and

now it's your turn

to do the same on your blog"

~~

many of you have hugged me and patted me on the back

reassuring me that what I do here is worthy and I have failed to say thank you

by playing along and I'm here to apologize

and

to finally play

~~

1. it's been so cold here in wisconsin, that when I see people waiting at the bus stop, I wish I could stop and pick them and take them where they need to go.

~~

2. I like to give big tips at restaurants, thinking that often, our waitress is probably a single mom working 3 jobs and that what I leave behind could make a difference in her life.

~~

3. although I love the little things in life, it's also the little things that drive me nuts. for example, yesterday I wanted to buy a pair of socks, but the ones that I wanted were in a 3-pack and the other two pairs were awful. I didn't buy them.

~~

4. in high school I was a varsity boys basketball cheerleader and was also on the track team. I held the school record for the 400 for 3 years until some little snit came along and broke it. the little snit was my cousin.

~~

5. it seems that the hair on my legs doesn't grow nearly as fast in the winter months as it does during the summer.

~~

6. I've been working in my journal and love to paint and create the pages, but hate to write on them when they're finished...which pretty much makes my journal a book of artwork instead of a journal filled with thoughts and dreams and upsets and desires and secrets.

~~

7. I have a hard time giving my full attention to people or things or ideas. my family jokes that's it's my adult a.d.d. and I often think it's not a joke, that it probably really is that and that I even had it as a child, but they didn't have a name for it back then.

~~

and

in the true name of tag

I'm supposed to tag 7 more people to play this game

but

since I don't want to hurt any feelings

you're all

it

::

so thank you

and

you and you and you

for being part of my blogging life

and

thinking highly enough of me

to let me be part of yours

by awarding me the kreativ blogger and scrap honest awards

and

to those of you I forgot

I am so sorry

::

wide open...

*

even after all these years

~~

she studied his square jaw line

determined it would be the same one she had memorized

from

all those nights she laid awake

outlining every inch of him

from the dim light

coming through the slit in the curtain

while he obliviously slept the night away

~

the curtain

that had never hung quite right

now that she thought about it

~

the room

had grown eerily quiet

if that was even possible

and

now

motionless

except for the air being stirred up

by

slow blinking lashes unbalancing themselves on ruggedly high cheekbones

~

she finally spoke

~

she said his name out loud

~

at least she thought it was out loud

and

when she saw baby steps of a smudgy glimmer in his eyes

a recognition of sorts

she knew her voice had been heard

~~

christopher gently reached out to her

and

like wax being poured into a mold

natalie melted into him

remembering this was the only place she had ever truly fit

~~

he carried her to the bed she once shared with him

while ever so softly

removing

her headband

and

setting it purposely on the night stand

as if to make a statement

~

the headband that had been keeping her face wide open

~~

his lips

with a wild hunger

bit hers

~

he tasted the way she remembered

~

like old cigarettes swimming in a deep dark liquor

~

a musky kind of smell

that somehow

reminded her of her grandmothers house

which

had always comforted her

like an old torn quilt

~

it was warm and wonderful

making

her want to roll around in it for days

~

actually

for nights

~

days and days

of

long nights

with only the sound of dragonfly wings in the distance

*

this is part two of

"she wonders"

where I completely left you hanging

~

which means I've had more nights of tossing and turning

which means

not enough sleep

which means

time to the call the doctor and ask for help

or maybe

I just need

a few glasses of warm milk

*

buried, but in a good way...

sorry

I haven't been here

playing

or

sharing in my

home away from home

but

I've been busy

surprising and shopping and eating and laughing and remembering

~~

my older sister from maine has been here

having flown in as a surprise for my little sister

who just turned

41

~~

there was cake and confetti and streamers and horn blowing and dancing

well

not really

~~

just cake

but

it was a really really good cake

~thanks to mom~

~~

so

today I am buried under the piles of laundry

that didn't get done

and

the bills that didn't get paid

and

the overall

everything

that got put on hold

while I was playing

but

that's okay

~~

because

we'll be talking about this week of love and surprises for years to come

and

all that laundry and those bills

well

they'll all be forgotten in a day

*

waves with hardly any depth...

I

thought I'd share

my

sunday morning thoughts

that came in like waves

~~

the static electricity in this house

has currents strong enough to restart my heart

if need be

~~

the jail inmate/dog program in our area makes me smile

as I truly believe that these inmates probably didn't feel worthy

"on the outside"

to begin with

and

that just maybe

the responsibility they have for training these dogs

deemed unruly

and

being recognized for all their hard work

"on the inside"

will make them feel worthy enough to be one of us

when they are

"on the outside"

again

~~

they were rating video games this morning on a news channel

and

said the second versions of some that are coming out are better than the first

because

they involve even more blood

~I choked a bit on my tea over this one~

~~

the temperature here is

minus zero

and

I'm wondering

is there a minus zero and if there is

is it really necessary since I think

zero

pretty much says it all

~~

for 8 months now

I've had a mac

and

I just figured out last week that when I'm looking for something on my

"desktop"

everything is in alphabetical order

~go figure~

~~

and

last but not least

at all

on the back of my athleta catalog

it says that in

sanskrit

"kurva"

means

"one who does"

damn

I think kurva should have been my word for the year

*

sometimes winter does this to you...

this is sophie

~

from last year

~

but

sometimes during january

when I don't have any new

"perfect for the moment"

photos

to share

due to the cold and snow

you just might be seeing some of my favorites

that

bear repeating

~

and

this one does

~

~happy weekend~

*

I love old...

I love

peeling paint

broken windows

caved in roofs

ladders with missing rungs

cracked pottery

empty brick silos

paths worn into the earth

windmills with missing paddles

dead trees

pitted glass bottles

cracked slate chalk boards

and

sepia photos

but

I love new

too

~~

just not as much

::

it makes me want to run away...

can I be brutally honest

without hurting any feelings

?

I hope I can

~

okay

here goes

~

I've always been overly sensitive to smells and for some reason it seems

certain smells are even stronger to me in the winter time

~

anyhow

the last two movies we have gone to see

~in sold out theaters~

I have had to sit behind women who must have forgotten they had already

sprayed perfume on themselves at home

and

decided to stop at the mall and take a quick swim in the perfume department

before buying their movie tickets

~

just a week ago while flying home

I covered my nose with my scarf

~almost the entire flight~

just to keep the cologne

that the man in front of me was wearing

from burning my nasal passages

~~

am I the only one sensitive to perfumes or sprays

or

feeling like my space is being intruded upon if I can smell you

or

thinking that soap is the best thing anybody can ever wear

?

don't get me wrong

I think perfume and cologne can be a wonderful thing

if you spray it

lightly

on your skin

underneath

your clothing

instead of wearing it as your last layer

before you head out the door

~

so I'm just saying

for me

the smell of a warm bath and soap

anywhere on a body

is just scrumptious

and

as far as I know

it's never been known to make anyone's eyes tear up or their throats swell

or

send people looking for a new seat

~

honestly

I'd rather sit next to someone who smells of sweat

from a hard day at work

then someone who smells like all the perfume samples

that the avon lady left behind

when she dropped off the newest catalog

~

like I said

I'm just saying

*

she's come undone...

maybe not undone

but

I am

unravelling

::

I told myself awhile back that I

could never

would never

take an online class

because

"they just aren't me"

but

I lied

::

I'm in a class

with 186 other students from all over the world

and

even though this is only

day 3

of an 8 week course

I'm loving it

::

yes yes yes

it's the the unravelling class with susannah

and

she's scrumptious and funny and real

and

she makes us think and write and take photos and laugh

and

well

really

isn't that the greatest class you've ever heard of

::

and

the best part

I can have a snow day or a sick day or a skip day

anytime I want

and

if I want to go to class in my pajamas

I can

and

if I want to eat cookies and drink tea while I'm listening to susannah talk

I can

and

if I don't show up until noon because I was dancing and reading the mail

nobody is going to send me to the principal's office

::

wow

if high school had been like this

I would have been a straight A student

::

excuse me now

but

I have to go to do my homework

while

sitting in a tub full of bubbles

::

gosh I love school

~

I fell yesterday...

not

down

::

just

totally in love

::

there's more of this sweet

~just wanna eat him up little munchkin~

boy

over here

::