she wonders...

the grey sky

feeling full of questions

suddenly turned black and calm

as if it had finally closed it's eyes

reminding natalie

of a color she hadn't seen in months

due to the sleepless nights that had plagued her

~~

she realized

the wind

who hadn't been breathing for days

had finally emptied it's lungs in an exhale

so passionate

that it had actually taken her own breath away

while making the little hairs on the back of her neck

cautiously dance

~~

she started to lower the dusty window shade

and

as she turned

a flicker in the street light caught her eye

~

the snow had started to fall

~

and

she knew that even if it came down

heavy

like sand being poured from a bucket

it could never fill the hole in her heart

that loneliness

had created

~~

she blew the last of the dripping candles out

and

slowly

while her hands held tight to the railing

she climbed the steep stairway

~~

her faded quilt

was rumpled into a pile of confusion

at the end of her mattress

and

for the first time

she noticed the edges had started to fray

~~

it was also at that moment

that she felt a warm hand on her boney shoulder

and

she shuddered so hard from the touch

that she actually felt the hardwood floor shift beneath her

~~

she didn't want to turn around

fearful that the touch was only her imagination

again

~

but slowly

her swan like neck

so full of questions

curved slightly

and

she could see her reflection in the bubbled glass of her bedroom window

and

as she reached up to touch her face

to confirm that she was real

there he was

~

christopher

~

the man

she had only ever been allowed to dream about

but

had always been able to love

*

when I toss and turn at night

this is what I wake up with in the morning

~

words that don't make any sense to me

words that stop too soon

words that want to be written into a story

words that scream for metaphors

~

maybe

what I wrote today

will be an excerpt in a book I'll write in the future

maybe

~

in the meantime

I'll be looking for a title and a story and a climax and an ending

~

but for now

this is all I have

*

*

I'd like to give a huge shout out to

chuck

who is a writer and an author and teases us a few times a week

with his amazing excerpts

always begging us for more

and

who obviously inspired me today