maybe you're my favorite...

i walk slowly and listen. then i whisper my dreams quietly to the wind.

~

the day i took these photos, early signs of fall reached out and gently touched me. 

right now fall, who moved in last weekend with just a few bags, 

lives on the damp, tree covered side of the pond. 

but

don't be fooled. summer is still shaking her groove thing on the sunny side.

~

the birds seem to have disappeared and have been replaced with hundreds of dragonflies. but to be honest with you, i like the birds better. at least they have a personality.

i don't recommend shooting straight into the sun. ever. but late in the day, if you hold your camera just right, you can capture the sun without burning your retinas. honest. you can.   

and

for some reason, every time i end up with sun filled photos, they're my favorite.

for at least a day or two. 

*

my feelings about porn....

well that certainly got your attention

hee hee

~

how was your weekend. mine was just busy enough that i don't have anything else for today, as the house and the grocery store are begging me to get my act together.

*

hello beautiful....

i can hear the cicadas at night. they make noise without a care in the world. wouldn't it be great if we could do that, too. think about it. think about walking outside after the sky has colored itself that perfect shade of black. standing there. looking around. 

then screaming loud enough that someone could possibly call it deafening. 

yet they wouldn't care. or be surprised.

and

might even think it beautiful

~

maybe this should be PHOTO TIP friday. 

maybe you want to learn how to take a photo like the one above and have a totally cool bokeh background. oh and just so you know, that word has been pronounced in more way then i can count. i say bokeh like "boke-uh" which sounds like "boca"

anyhow

trying to describe how to do this isn't easy, so bear with me. first of all, you need to shoot on aperture mode and use the largest aperture your LENS will allow. now remember, the largest aperture is actually the smallest number. like 1.4 or a 2.8 or 3.5

~

now think about your depth of field. you want to try and get as much distance between your subject and the light source behind it, as that's what gives you the bokeh effect.

~

confused yet. let's talk about my photo in hopes of making it clearer. i shot this hanging flower indoors at a conservatory with my 100mm lens and my aperture at 3.5 with a ton of space between the flower and the sun coming in from the skylights in the ceiling. did i do it on purpose. not at all. my 100mm lens is what i use for my macro shots {which is what i had been shooting} and i just happened to see this withered flower about my head and took a photo of it. i could have switched to what would have been a more appropriate lens, like my 17-55 and put my aperture at 2.8, but i was too lazy to do that. would i still have gotten bokeh in the background with the 17-55. yes. as my lens would have gotten me closer to my subject BUT i still would have had a ton of space between the flower and my light source.

~

sorry. now i've really done it. you're even more confused. right

~

the best time to practice and play with bokeh, is at christmas. a lit up christmas tree in your background, while you focus on your child or a wrapped present will be a. fun and b. produce some amazing bokeh 

~

am i a certified instructor for giving directions on achieving bokeh in your photos. 

not a chance. but i do like to share a little bit of what i know.

~

the happiest of weekending to all of you. 

and if you're on the east coast, with irene approaching the area where you live, you probably aren't even  on the computer reading this, but just so you know, a bunch of prayers are being sent your way.

*

i curl my feet under me when i sit....

her internal alarm clock went off and she up was up at 6am and needed to go outside. even though my eyes weren't open, i grabbed my camera and took photos of the sky while she sniffed all the smells that had arrived in the yard overnight. the sky was brilliant with shades of pink pleading with the orange streaks to get of the way. but they didn't budge. 

shortly after the exhausting fight, the orange dissolved into tiny little pieces and was replaced with an ebony sky with the most perfect skin tone that made me want to reach out and touch it.

 it brought heavy showers and let its thunder shake the house. 

it was that perfect morning storm that you wish had happened a bit earlier while you were still dreaming about being a fashion photographer in central park.

oh wait. that was probably just me.

recently this is what i've had on my mind.

 i think you can have everything you've ever wanted, but if that everything isn't filling you up and igniting a flame, then all that everything is really nothing. let me put that in a simple way. if you have tons of clothes in your closet, yet feel you have nothing to wear....see, now you're getting it.

~

i heard about an author whose book talks about the need for all of us to get rid of 75% of the things in our closet. that we tend to only wear our favorite things. 

i'm not so sure that 75% pertains to just our closets. i think she was referring to things that weigh us down. the things we aren't passionate about or have any use for. look around you. does everything that surrounds you right this minute, make you happy. 

if you're like me, the answer might be yes. i love my office and all the things that surround while i sit here and type. but other parts of my house or my house in general, not so much.

~

let's go back to the closet. could you. could you happily get rid of 75% of the items in there.

i might try it. 

if you're still here reading my words and i haven't lost you, well then you deserve a medal.

but this is how i am. who i am. how i think. how i talk.

and 

if you lived next door and wandered over in your pajamas to have a cup of tea with me on this now very grey morning and we sat in comfy chairs facing each other with our feet all curled up underneath us.....well you get the picture. 

*

why didn't anyone tell me....

that i would love "country strong" with all my heart. did you see the movie. didn't you love it. did you download all the music. did you fall in love with beau and those eyes of his....and that smile....and that voice and his soft ways. okay fine, i loved everything about beau. 

~

can you believe that gwyneth paltrow can sing like that. and that tim mcgraw can act.

when "kelly" went and saw travis {i am not a movie spoiler, i promise} did you cry. i did. 

i also cried when "kelly" told "chiles" a few things that had been on her mind.

~

this is a movie about love and fame and that timing is everything.

~

i know there are some people out there who are true movie critics and might not have cared for this one. but the hubby and i loved it. so did our almost 20 year old son.

so that has to mean something. right.

*

my saturday in madison....

yesterday

we stopped by "african fest"

~

it's funny how lately, i'm constantly on the lookout for something new. something fun. 

well, african fest did not disappoint. 

the best part of it was talking to my new camera friend 

{bottom lower left} 

we were both shooting and he struck up a conversation with me and before i knew it, i was talking to a brilliant high schooler who lives in london, but is here visiting family. 

he knew so much about cameras and photography 

 and was honest, intriguing and impressive.

and just when i thought i didn't need a full frame camera, well, he has me rethinking that idea.

everywhere i looked yesterday.....HAIR and more hair.

i totally had a case of hair envy

{check out the girl is the first collage....i couldn't take my eyes off of her hair while she danced}

oh

and 

this is lucky

~

he is one fierce and talented drummer. i thought he was gorgeous when he wasn't smiling, but when i caught his attention and asked for his photo. well his smile melted me.

*

simplicity is so sweet....

"which one of my photographs is my favorite....

the one i'm going to take tomorrow"

~imogen cunningham~

*

the happiest photo taking weekend to all of you

*

*

*

*

hello friday randomness....

i have been "off" this entire week. my days. the amount of time in each day. the way i feel.

maybe it's just something in the air. or another growth spurt. didn't your mom always tell you that, when you weren't feeling quite right...."it's just another growth spurt honey, no worries"

~

lately as i blog hop, i am completely sucked into the film and polaroid photos. why do they have so much more depth and personality then digital. why haven't the camera companies figured out we need a film and polaroid mode right next to aperture.

i have a friend though that would scream if that happened. he thinks anything other then dslr perfection is degrading your photos. silly man. 

or am i wrong. 

what do you think. do you like to see perfection every time in a photo or do you like the idea of mixing it all up. 

film, iphone apps, polaroids, textures.

~

if you were thinking of going to the seychelles. don't. did you hear about their shark problem.

~

madison celebrates gay pride fest this weekend and i love that. some of you might disagree with me, but as long as you love and are loved in return, who cares what sex they are is my motto. 

now please just let them get married already. anywhere.

~

target right now is a great place to buy organizational items. they are packed to the gills with all that fun stuff for college dorm rooms and apartments. and don't even get me started on the cool back to school supplies that i don't have to buy anymore for my kids, but that i now buy for myself. have you seen some of those notebooks with the vintage wallpaper looking flowers on them. and the pencil boxes. swoon.

~

okay. that's all i've got for now. 

thanks again for all the prayers you sent to my friend and her daughter this week and for all the "go get your new camera" WOOTs. you guys are the best cheerleaders EVER. 

~

happy weekend

{and as if i haven't taken enough of your time, latest photo shoot photos are here}

just over here doing my happy dance....

remember yesterday when i mentioned cash for gold. well all i have to say is 

"RUN. RUN NOW" 

to  someone who buys gold

~

i only had 3 pieces that i hadn't worn in 10 years

and

now i have $1300 in my pocket.

~

if you decide to do this. shop around. i went to three different places {a jewelry and coin pawn shop and two jewelry stores} and got three different offers. they ranged from $1185 to $1300. 

gold prices are at a peek right now. 

it was my first stop 

{a tiny local mom and pop jewelry store} 

that offered me the most money

~

hello new camera

*

you can call me a pawn star....

{sneak peek from monday's photo shoot}

did you think i forgot about the red tutu. i didn't. it's actually in a box right now on its way to the meri. she won the drawing. i narrowed the names down to a small group of women who all have birthdays coming up soon and next month, meri is going to be doing whatever she wants to do on her birthday,

in a red tutu. i can't wait.

~

the prayers from yesterday were amazing and i'll be passing them on to my friends. actually, all of you visiting me here as often as you do are amazing. so if you didn't already know that. 

well hear this. YOU ARE.

~

i was in the camera shop yesterday. that's a dangerous place to be. i walked out of there as fast as i could, but the new camera i was looking at continued to stare at me. i glanced back in the window once i made it safely outside, and i think i saw it shed a tear. i'm pretty sure it wanted to go home with me. 

~

i have a 14kt gold necklace that i haven't worn for years that has been living in our safe in the basement. today i'm going to see about trading it in. you know. the whole "cash for gold" thing.

have any of you done this.

~

is it just me. or are there smidgens of fall quietly tiptoeing their way into what i'm still calling summer.

winter boots at the shoe stores. holiday decorations at michaels. 

the leaves just starting to turn. the cooler nights {no complaints on that one}

oh mother nature. please take it slowly. 

pleeeaaaaasssse 

{sorry about the whiney voice}

*

can i ask for more prayers.....

this weekend, we watched in horror, just like everyone else did, the stage collapse at the indiana state fair. indiana was our home for 8 years and no matter where we live now, pieces of our hearts will forever remain there.

~

i am terribly saddened today to find out that our indiana friends {who now live in ohio} were seriously injured in the collapse.

my friend jill and her daughter jaymie are now in stable condition, but it looks like a long recovery will be ahead of them. from what i have heard, jill has a collapsed lung and a crushed pelvis. jaymie, two broken legs and a skull fracture.

~

i have been blessed by all of you when i personally needed your prayers. do you think today you can send some more. this time for jill and jaymie.

~

thank you so much

*

{for many of you outside of the midwest, you might not have heard about this terrible accident. i hesitated at first to share the video, but then decided i needed you to see how horrible it was}

the video is here

and

this is one of the many articles i found along with this one

*

part of my weekend in photos...

check out the his socks and shoes

all of these men were waiting for the beer festival shuttle

{obviously you bring your own pretzels}

willy street is a must 

if you ever visit madison

and

if you make it to willy street

lazy janes is a fantastic spot to eat and people watch

*

just something i heard....

"it's not your job to like me"

"it's mine"

.

.

.

a field of love...

there's a field by us. a sunflower field. close enough that we can walk to it.

it's the only place i've actually seen bees bathe in pollen. 

they don't mind if you watch.

the baby sunflowers are my favorite. they seem so brave.

i wish you could walk there with me. 

i know you'd love it. my parents did when i took them last week.

hundreds and hundreds of sunflowers. all of them watching us while we watched them.

a mutual love affair.

*

senior sneak peek....

  

i know his momma is anxious to see these

so i'm teasing her with  just a few shots

~

normally when i'm shooting senior photos

i don't want other people in the pictures

but

the walkers on the beach

well

i think the timing was perfect

with just a quick "run through"

this one might be my favorite

~

i love the hood and the serious look

 but

you have to admit

his smile is contagious

thank you early evening sun

for coming along and being cooperative

*

i'll stand by you....

i'll stand by you

through the good that we always expect and the uninvited ugly

~

through the simple colors of life we paint all on our own 

and 

the thick murky brown when they all get mixed together

~

through the poorly shaped words that are foreign on our tongues 

and

the silence we retreat to that makes us grasp for air

~

through

the quiet nights doused in grey thoughts 

and

 the morning sun whose warmth gives us the strength to start all over again

~

i'll stand by you

*

{there are more of my black and whites at simply exposed}

go ahead, stick out your tongue....

all about london.....

this is baby london

and

i got to spend my whole birthday with him

and

lots and lots of my other family members

~

what better gift could i have asked for on my birthday

but a baby to photograph

over and over again

~

anyhow

here are my favorites from that day

{i sure hope you have time to see his mommy and the rest of his family}

*

you can wear a tutu, too.....

after i wrote this post

she said

"i want to make you a red tutu for your birthday"

i said

"oh deb, that would be amazing"

but

what was really amazing

was dancing in a field

in a red tutu

on my birthday

while my hubby smiled and took photos of me

and

what would a birthday be without a jump

*

now here's the fun part

and

even though i haven't asked deb, i know she'll love this idea.

~

i want to pass this tutu on. i want to send this red birthday tutu to someone else who believes that dancing in a red tutu on their birthday sounds like fun. if you think you're that person, leave a comment saying

"hell yes. i'll dance in a red tutu"

and

by the end of the week, i'll draw a name.

~

and

when your birthday's over and you're done dancing

you'll need to share your photos with us and then pass the tutu on again.

~

i mean really

life's just too short NOT to dance in a red tutu on your birthday

right

*

also

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

everyone

for all the amazing birthday wishes and blessings

~

you guys 

are

THE BEST

and

made me feel like a princess

*

it's almost that time again....

yummy cake

yellow and turquoise balloons

and

 wishes from my heart

whispered upon flickering candle flames

 that i pray come true

~

i'll be forty seven on sunday 

forty seven

i like spelling my age out, as 47 looks weak, but forty seven feels beautiful and strong

~

i read something recently that went something like this

"forty seven doesn't say what i am, i say what forty seven is"

~

i don't mind getting older, but i do wonder where all the time is going. 

i wish i hadn't wasted some of it. that's a lesson learned. 

i also wish i had savored more of my time. 

i mean really having licked it up and devoured it until i couldn't hold anymore.

but most of us don't do that, do we.

instead, we tend to believe that we have tomorrow to do what we didn't do or see today.

i want to change that.

~

so

raise your glass with me

as this is my birthday toast to all of you

~

"here's to another year in the buffet line of life. where no matter how full you are, you just keep going back for more and more until you almost burst. i'll be right there beside you, giving you a bigger spoon, if i notice the one you have is too small"

*

happy weekend everyone

i am today....

She was elusive. She was today. She was tomorrow. She was the faintest scent of a cactus flower, the flitting shadow of an elf owl. We did not know what to make of her. In our minds we tried to pin her to a corkboard like a butterfly, but the pin merely went through and away she flew.