i had a dream....

where a little neon light

in an all night diner

kept flashing

and

even when i pinched my eyes until they hurt

i could still see it

and

then

there i was on a park bench

surrounded by pigeons

with missing feathers

reading a passage in an old vintage book

whose spine

no longer in tact

that referenced the freedom one can find

by

flying a kite

in an open field

with just the wind at your back

and

the sun in your eyes

and

i decided

this was a dream worth holding onto

even though i've always believed

i should

but

today

i want to live this one

body parts can be confusing....

remember

a few weeks ago when i had a scare with my eye

and

they sent me for an orbital ct scan

and

found everything to be alright

~~

well

the eye pain subsided

but

the left side of my face

from my eyebrow to the bottom of my nose

continued to not feel right

~~

enough so

that my doctor ordered another ct scan

this time of my whole head

~~

with contrast

~~

she called it a brain scan

~~

when the nurse called back with the results from the radiologist

she said the report read

findings

"nothing remarkable"

and

as happy as i was that the my ct scan was normal

i laughed at her

and

said

really

because

my hubby thinks my brain is quite remarkable

somedays

so much so

that he wishes he could control the on/off switch to it

~~

oh wait

silly me

that's my mouth

that he'd like to turn off every now and then

not

my brain

*

but what does it really mean.....

she believed

that spring was the only season

that could make you look at everything as a new beginning

~~

she believed

that being happy

was the only choice you could ever make

that would ever really mean anything

~~

she believed

that being patient was a gift that people are born with

and

that if it had to be learned

it would never be fully grasped

~~

she believed

that trying to change someone

was the only thing in life that was

truly impossible

~~

she believed

that believing

in herself

was

the only thing she had any control over

and

somedays

that belief

was a slippery little sucker that she had a hard time holding onto

*

exercise, being unfaithful and american idol...

i should walk and lift weights the way i used to

but

with the strange positions i get into while talking photos

and

then of course

carrying my camera and all my lenses with me everywhere i go

i work up quite a sweat

~who needs a gym membership~

and

yes

i understand you saying to yourself

"didn't we see enough eggs yesterday"

but

this is a different batch of eggs

~~

these

are old eggs

from about 10 years ago

that i bought at a country living type of store

and

id' forgotten how beautiful and deeply colored they were

and

how

now

mine look really ugly and pale in comparison

oh well

these are the real deal

though

with

marble sized egg yolks inside that move around when you shake them

and

dyed

with something i'll probably never ever know

unless some of you have the secret

~~

do you

do you have the secret

okay

okay

about being unfaithful

~~

forever

i have had a cup of my almond vanilla tea at least twice a day

with

french vanilla creamer perfectly mixed in

and

now i have to confess

i've been cheating on her

~~

she's been replaced

with

chai rooibos

~a yogi tea~

and

now i can't even remember what i ever saw in that almond vanilla gal

~~

and

one of the best parts of the yogi teas

is the little note attached to the tea bag

where the one this morning read

"if your word does not reflect your spirit and honor, do not speak"

and

last but not least

is anyone else disappointed in american idol this season

~~

i think they should just give the amazing

crystal

with her dreads and boho ways

the news

that she's the winner

and

take everyone else out of their misery

~~

i know that sounds harsh

but

as an avid watcher for years

this year so far has really been quite pathetic

~~

i hope the sun is shining where you are today

*

it's a mutual love affair....

i tried to be good

i tried to be all natural

i tried to dye my eggs with only food and spice items

but

it wasn't great

and

it took forever and made such a mess

~~

okay

the boiled chili powder created a neat color

as did the blueberry juice

but

the boiled spinach

well

the smell of that

made me hungry

~~

so i mixed up the paas with lemon juice

added rubber bands

for pretty lines

dunked just enough to add a bit more color to what i already had

and

ta-da

eggs for easter

of course

then i needed photos

of the finished product

so

the old brownie

{actually it's a kodak duraflex}

came out to play

i had forgotten how much i love that old camera

since

winter obviously put a cramp in our relationship

{honestly it's all my fault...as i kind of forgot about her}

but

things are looking up

i wish you could have been here

to see all the flirting going on

*

i think i'd like to try that shade of pink...

i have

laundry to wash

bills to pay

groceries to buy

floors to clean

furniture to dust

notes to write

emails to return

files to organize

appointments to make

papers to shred

and

flowers to buy

~~

maybe

i'll cross everything off my list

and

pretend it's already been done

except

for

the

flowers to buy

and

then i'll add

photos to take

new shades of lipstick to try

summer shoes to buy

songs to sing

feet to be massaged

and

candles to light

~~

i think maybe i'm onto something

here

~~

want to join me

*

i'll be there by ten...

i think

i would love to ride to your house

and

get to know you

~~

i think

we would walk through the woods

and

find fuzzy green moss and beige bumpy fungi growing under the damp trunks of trees

that we'd have to touch

and

photograph

just for fun

~~

i think

watching the sun gently move the clouds out of the way

while we ran through the fields

chasing butterflies

would make us hungry

and

we'd fill our plates with hummus and pita bread

and

sit under an old oak tree

on your grandmother's quilt

with

our legs crossed

while you poured the raspberry iced tea

~~

i think

we'd share stories and feelings

and

maybe even a deep dark secret or two

that would make us feel like friends

that had met in second grade

and

had never lost touch

~~

i think

when the growing navy sky reached low enough to toy with the cooling ground

telling me

it was time to leave

we'd make promises to see each other again

and

we'd hug for a very long time

and

tears would leave streaks on my cheeks

~~

i think

meeting you sounds perfect

*

this vintage vespa i found downtown

and

now i sorta covet it

*

they always say yes....

sometimes

they're just sitting out back

on a break from where they work

and

let me get a close up of their amazing tattoos

sometimes

they're sitting right next to me while i'm eating my lunch

sometimes

they want to know what kind of camera i have

and

sometimes

they ask me if i want to take their photo

before

i even have a chance to ask them

if i can

sometimes

they ask what i'll do with their photos

and

sometimes

they're curious about my blog

and

sometimes

they sing a beautiful song

while

i sit on the park bench across from them

just listening

*

these are some photos from friday

while i was out searching for that perfect spot for the book drop

{see earlier post}

~~

i'm not sure what it is that i find so fascinating about strangers

but

they pull me in every time

and

make me smile

and

if strangers can make a photographer smile

well

they must be doing something right

~~

next time

i hope to start adding a little bit of a bio to go along with the photos

thinking

that if i find a photo of them interesting

that their stories or just a little blip about them

would be

amazing

*

and

this

blew me away

thank you

kiki

and then the wind softly blew...

this weekend

i hope the sun illuminates your dancing soul

while

the sound of laughter keeps you awake

and

that you find

there is nothing

that can stand

between

you and your dreams

*

but

if your

weekend

turns out to be cloud filled and cold

while

silence holds you tenderly

and

something does stand in your way

remember you can always

go sideways

::

at least you'll be moving

it went down like this.....

i was picked to be a book fairy for

swirly girl's book project

and

yesterday

i was all "mission impossible" while roaming the streets of madison

~~

i had a few ideas as to where i wanted to leave her book to be found

so i staked out a few places

~~

first the hubby

{aka my partner in crime}

and

i ate lunch at

lazy jane's

on willy street

thinking this would be the perfect spot

but

the place was packed and trying to be invisible and sneaky inside that amazing place

was

going to be way impossible

{and there were only the two of us you know}

so

i just left a little

"a little swirly girl like"

note

on the couch

instead

we stopped in at my favorite store

ever

on state street

anthology

when i thought about this as a

"maybe let's leave it here spot"

but

in hoping to photograph the person finding it

i decided we had

to keep moving on

but

first i shopped a little bit and took photos because this place is amazing

{see the book hiding in this photo}

and

if you come and visit me i promise to take you here shopping

{okay enough of the bribing}

~~

so anyhow

we moved further down state street where it looked like all the action was

and

that was in front of

urban outfitters

{and yes i'll take you there, too}

here is where i decided to blend in with the crowd

and

really get my tom cruise act together

see

you can hardly notice me

and

then while casually looking side to side

i walked across the street where the hubby had spotted

the

"perfect drop off point"

and

then quickly and discreetly i turned back towards him

hoping nobody

had noticed anything

and

then we sat and watched and sat some more

~~

a few people walking by turned and looked at it

and

one young college kid with his friends really wanted to pick it up

but

they convinced him to keep walking

and

then we thought

how lucky we were that it was gorgeous outside

because

this could take all afternoon

at one point i told the hubby that i really really wanted to get the person taking the book

in a photograph

since i didn't think anyone else had

that had already participated in this world wide totally cool activity

when all of sudden this young girl appears

~~

after looking at it for a minute and then taking a photo of it with her cell phone

{we think}

she reaches for it

goes for the grab

quickly

and

keeps walking

while looking straight ahead

and

then just a bit further up the street

she opens the package and pulls out the book

and

i am like

"oh my gosh we did it....we photographed the person getting the book"

"SCORE"

~~

and

then just like that it was over

and

we headed back up state street with silly little grins on our faces

talking into our wrist watches

wondering if our undercover boss

had another mission ready for us

~~

we were on fire

*

so like, ummmm dude.....

"why do you want to take our pictures"

"i'm gonna leave my board at the bottom so i can get air for ya....are ya ready"

"why are we backwards"

"i call it a johnny hoppin"

"seriously dude...you want us to skate right at your face while you're sitting there"

~~

i love shooting people

~complete strangers~

especially in their own environment and

after the winter's dry spell

it was fantastic to be outside yesterday

~~

i headed to the skateboard park

which is kind of a scary place

but

once again

since i have a "wear my jeans low so you can see my boxers" teenager myself

who doesn't skate

they don't bother me

~~

they are always so curious as to why i want their photos

and

always cooperative to do anything i ask

~~

obviously

the skateboarding photos weren't enough for me

and

i had to have my

tried and true

jumping photos

that i started last year

~~

they were wonderful with my crazy wishes and laughing through each photo

and

then giving the ones who wouldn't jump

a hard time

~~

oh

thank you warm weather

for letting me breathe again